Dragons and Presentations

     A week ago, I received a brochure holding an opportunity to participate in a Virtual international conference arranged by PSGR Krishnammal College. Here, one could present their research on the theme of the event, 'Health Humanities', and sit in for the insightful addresses of the guest speakers. I would have skipped this opportunity had it been presented to me earlier but not this time. I knew I would regret it if I did not give it a shot. I was a knight faced with a dragon and I could either run from it or slay it. I would only be a knight in name if I don't attempt to slay it.

    Now I'm not one for public speaking. Speaking in front of strangers makes me feel like I swallowed a snake and it's trying to fights its way out of my mouth. As disgusting as that imagery is I seem to be unable to find another to explain it better at the moment. Well, I cannot simply swallow the giant snake with wings facing me so I decided that I must forget the eyes on me and forge on ahead. Now what is the best way to arm yourself against a dragon? If you were to ask me I'd say bravery and knowledge are both of great importance here. 

    This is where the research comes in. Now, I had one day to decide on a topic and send an abstract to them and three days to write the paper itself. I came up with something that resonates heavily with me: 'Exploring Suicidal Tendency through the Works of Select Writers'. While it is indeed a delicate topic, it is something that needs attention in the present day and age. One thing I realized in the process of selecting the topic was how difficult it is to know what one must write. What unique take can I provide? Even then, the anxiety of whether someone has already talked about it in the way I intend to. It might not be quick but I've learnt that patience and calm thinking will end up being helping in this scenario.

    Then came the actual process of writing which involved melt-downs over the inability to finish reading the full amount of material that I had planned to read before starting and a sleepless night, along with many cups of coffee. The fear of producing something lacking originality, of producing an inferior paper, it was all there. To any aspiring dragon slayers, the amount of work that goes behind it might be intimidating but at the end of the day, as long as you give it your best that's all that matters. The skilful handling of even a single blade of knowledge that one has is enough to slay the dragon even if they are not fully armed. Accepting that you can't always read all the material out there before presenting your thoughts is what one might need to remind oneself at times. So it remains that you must choose carefully what you do read, to fuel your arguments.

    Another part of the struggle was formatting. Following an MLA format, especially regarding citation list can be a lot if you've referenced a lot of works. That alone could take hours if you're going about it manually. After all that, I managed to finish and send it in around 11:30 pm last Saturday, just before the end of the deadline. With this done, all that was left to do was wait. Wait for the day you'll face the dragon, wondering if your paper has been accepted.

    Then the day comes that you learn your article was accepted and you realize the next day, you're going to slay a dragon and your mind is buzzing, imagining all the ways it could go wrong, leaving you unable to fall asleep until you tell the voices in your head to be quiet. Then tomorrow finally arrived and it happened. Today I presented the paper. Today I conquered my fear. Today I slayed a dragon. While I would undoubtedly still be afraid of situations like these, I've learnt that the real bravery is when one attempts to take the opportunity despite their fear. 

    Overall it was a wonderful experience. I learnt a lot more from the guest speakers regarding the various aspects of Health Humanities and even in matters of presenting the paper itself. The use of graphics in imparting medical and physiological knowledge in particular, one of the topics, was quite interesting. I hope to learn more and slay more dragons in the future and to improve my technique.  

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